LOYALTY

"The essence of being human is that one does not seek perfection, that one is sometimes willing to commit sins for the sake of loyalty, that one does not push asceticism to the point where it makes friendly intercourse impossible, and that one is prepared in the end to be defeated and broken up by life, which is the inevitable price of fastening one’s love upon other human individuals." George Orwell

I asked a friend of mine what they would like me to write about in my next blog and they instantly responded LOYALTY. I then asked them what aspect of loyalty they were thinking of and they said, "the one demanding sacrifice of oneself."

Now, I am not totally sure what they meant by that last statement but it is still an interesting theme and one which we can certainly give some attention to.

There is a web site you can go to which has a list of famous quotes. I typed in loyalty and, among all the statements about loyalty to country and abuse of loyalty, etc. I found the quote above. This quote struck me as particularly sensible. Here is another way of saying essentially the same thing:

"Man proves to be genuine by his sincerity; to be noble by his charity of heart; to be wise by his tolerance; to be great by his endurance throughout the continually jarring influences of life." Hazrat Inayat Khan

So, this blog has been sitting in my computer for over a week now while I try to figure out what to say. Maybe I just did.

Yesterday I got an email from a young lady, the daughter of an old friend, asking me to initiate her into Sufism and to be her guide. It is always a deep honor when this happens and this morning, as I was driving my daughter to work, I was going over in my mind the words you say when you initiate someone, as it is not something that I do all that often. At the beginning of the little initiation ceremony you ask three questions. One, Is it your wish to be initiated into the Sufi Order International? Two, will you give your allegiance to the message of unity brought by Hazrat Inayat Khan. Three, will you view this initiation as a most sacred trust given to you by God? As you can see, of the three questions, two involve loyalty. Granted the third question is more about how you see yourself but loyalty is there. Notice that we do not ask that the one initiated give allegiance to anything other then an ideal. There is no demand that one be loyal to a flag for instance or a guru figure or anything like that; just an ideal, Unity. But then an interesting thing happens. Humans have a hard time giving loyalty to such an ephemeral ideal as Unity. We are much more comfortable with a more solid object. Country is about the broadest ideal that most people can feel comfortable with and even then loyalty to country will often be given more substances by coming to mean a particular political party's assumptions about what that should be. In spiritual groups it almost always means loyalty to the leader.

Another thing that occurs to me, that is not a requirement of the second question I mentioned, is sacrifice. Somehow loyalty has come to have this secondary notion attached to it that one may, probably will, be asked to sacrifice something. I think this is what my friend was asking when they mentioned the internal demand that one somehow sacrifice oneself. I think that just about every person that I guide has, at one time or another, asked me what they will have to give up to follow the spiritual path. The classic Zen answer to that question is, "Give up giving up!" which of course also ends up being a kind of sacrifice on their part. Humans can certainly be persistent.

What seems to happen is that we need to over simplify the ideal and to give it a kind of structure that may or may not have anything at all to do with the ideal itself. We surround it with rules and demands and buzz words to the point that it is no longer the ideal that matters; it is all the attachments we have hung off of it.

For just a moment then ask yourself what your true ideal is. Loyalty to the ideal is a given. Then ask yourself how many attachments go with it. Make a list if you have to. Consider all of the various ramifications of your ideal. Let's see what happens.

In rereading I see that I did not touch on Orwell's last statement and it is certainly something that needs mention. One of the aspects of loyalty to individuals that is always there is our tendency to make them more then they really are. For instance; the spiritual student will always idealize the teacher/guide and will give them a wholly unrealistic kind of super human reality. Then, when the student discovers the all too human sides of the teacher, extreme disappointment results. And this happens in all aspects of life. So, if you recognize from the beginning that the object of your adoration is human and is subject to the human condition then there is no need for disappointment. Wry amusement may be more appropriate.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

INTERNAL ELEGANCE

PART 3

"Our usual sense of personal identity has the effect of encapsulating ourselves in a limitation - with the consequence that we fail to fulfill the purpose of our lives which is to realize and unfurl the divine perfection invested in our being."

Pir Vilayat Inayat Khan

As some of you may know, people I guide live all over the world. Once, at the behest of someone who was curious, I counted up and discovered that there are at least 15 different countries represented in my circle of friends. Many of them talk with me via instant messaging, usually on Yahoo. One of my friends, on the other side of the world, was chatting with me the other day and told me that she had been speculating about her usefulness in existence. The question was would it matter if she had never been? My first reaction, of course, was to say that certainly she would be missed but I didn't say it. What I did say was, "Do you believe you have a soul?" There was a long pause, the little cursor on the dialogue box kept blinking. Then, the answer appeared, "Yes I have a soul." I then asked if she could see that the soul expresses itself as it wants or needs to. That was a bit more complicated and we talked about that a bit. Then I pointed out that if she did not exist we would have had to invent her.

The argument goes something like this. All aspects of creation have representations within ordinary reality. They may be very evident or just blossoming but they will be there, at least to the limit of our capacity to notice them. I suppose that means that there are aspects of creation that have yet to be represented. Perhaps they are waiting for combinations that do not yet exist in ordinary reality. That is as may be but, for the purposes of this discussion, we might say that all representations, once they are focused into a single life form, are unique. Even in the most mundane of expressions there is uniqueness, small differences. Snow flakes are a good example. Since all representations are totally unique, in that they have a point of view and life's experiences that give them uniqueness, or at least some form of individuality, each is necessary to enable the Universe or God or whatever you care to call the Prime motivator to know itself. A mystic might argue that even a show flake has a certain amount of self awareness, in as much as the Universe is aware of the snowflake. The trick part of all of this is that there is a constant flow of learning through the body of the Universe. In the case of sentient consciousness, the interaction of all the myriad souls has a flow or perhaps an unfolding. Since the flow that created the person who inspired this blog existed, then it would follow that the particular qualities that make up her personality also had to exist. So, in that respect, her existence was inevitable.

I think my friend's question is also an inevitable one for those of us who want to know ourselves. Personally, I think that the need to know oneself is a fairly rare compulsion but it is a compulsion; there is no doubt of that. It is an inevitable question but it is also one in which a person can get stuck. I can easily imagine someone feeling quite proud of themselves for noticing this question and then thinking that they had discovered something profound. In a way it is profound but in another way it is simply another step along the path to self understanding. I suppose I might be a bit prejudiced since so many of the people I talk to, maybe all of them, are struggling to understand who they are and what they should be doing. I am in that group myself.

Maybe I should reiterate that all of these little articles I write for this blog are my speculations. They are not definitive answers to anything. However, if my speculations manage to rear questions in your mind and occasionally provide alternative modes thinking, then that is all to the good. I am convinced that what I call Internal Elegance is quite simply constantly questioning. Not in any pugnacious way but in continually asking oneself, what am I doing? There is a freedom to such questioning. It is a freedom of independence, even from one's own assumptions. The elegance arises when you push through your assumptions and allow yourself to notice your own elegance.

Every one, every single person now living, has a latent magnificence. We are all spawned from the desire of the Universe to know itself so how could it be otherwise. We have as many different ideas about ourselves as there are people but we all have one very important thing in common – we exist. And, because we exist, we have the opportunity to become all that we truly are. Isn't that wonderful?

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

INTERNAL ELEGANCE

PART 2

"Strive to discover the mystery before life is taken from you. If while living you fail to find yourself, to know yourself, how will you be able to understand the secret of your existence when you die?" Farid ud Din Attar

What would you suppose is the mystery of life that Farid ud Din Attar refers to? Take a moment and consider. I'll wait.

Now, notice that your mind wants to find a reason, a channel, some form of rational examination upon which to focus. The mind needs to understand, to grasp ideas, to have logic and facts that make sense. As it happens, in this particular case, reason is the last thing you need.

I was just thinking that when I am writing these blogs I tend to go to a place that is outside of my normal rational self. It is a place that allows the truth of being to push through the rational mind in order to discover one's breadth. Or that is how I think of it when I am back in the rational mind. What is also certain is that, even though I may be able to access certain attitudes and ideas that seem quite subtle and elegant in their own right, I don't actually live that way. I spend my life walking around banging into things and wondering why it hurts, just like everyone else. Which means, of course; that I am searching too. I am wondering what the mystery is and whether or not I understand even a small part of it the same as you.

If you have truly been paying attention to your inner needs you may have noticed that the level of assurance of place and position is inversely proportional to your state of awareness. In other words, the more aware you are of the Celestial realm, the less sure you are of your place within it. On the other hand, I have seen many people in the spiritual business who seem to feel the need to assure one and all, most especially themselves I suspect, of their very deep knowledge and fundamental surety of their place within the scheme of things. I would like to think this is a stage of growth for them but all too often it seems that people are stuck, or so it seems to me. I suppose that this is very reassuring to those people who gather round them in that it gives a kind of anchor to the drifting psyche and allows a certain composure or ease of emotion. But real spiritual evolution is just the opposite.

I think I have told this story before but I will retell it for the sake of this discussion. It was some years ago that I was once again driving Pir Vilayat to Kennedy airport. We were chatting about this and that when he suddenly turns sideways in the passenger seat to face me and declare, "I am 75 years old and am just now beginning to understand what a Sufi is." Needless to say this statement thoroughly surprised me as he had been teaching Sufism for the preceding 35 years. But it stuck with me as a kind of benchmark. If Pir Vilayat can feel this way, constantly refining and discovering and challenging the self, well then I certainly can do no less. To me that is a true internal elegance. The constant questioning of one's self assessment is a sure route to a deep understanding of, not only the self, but also the greater cosmos. And it is probably the answer to the puzzle posed by Attar above.

I am convinced that one of the stages in development of self knowledge for a lot of people is the N word. No. Self knowledge is just that, knowledge of the self, which means that you get to have boundaries. Granted, it is a stage and there are stages beyond but it is an important phase to go through. At first saying no can seem quite harsh and unforgiving of those around you but, after awhile, you get used to it. It is all part of learning who you are and, most importantly, as I stated last blog, that you matter. I am not advocating being obstreperous just for the sake of it. What I am saying, however; is that it is very important to have a look at just what you do accept and see if it aids you or hinders you. It is one of the ideals that the counter culture of the sixties and seventies was struggling with. We didn't really understand what we were doing but we knew that there was something wrong with what we were being told and we were determined to reject it, whatever it was. As it happens we made some serious errors but we did get the ball rolling as it were. Now it is up to anyone who recognizes that there is more, to learn to go deep within and discover that place of magnificence that is the true self and bring it forth. Not with pretense but with truth.

Remember; Patience, Courage and Discipline. With these three ideas in mind, you will do very well.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

INTERNAL ELEGANCE

"Love is the nature of life, beauty is the outcome of life, harmony is the means by which life accomplishes its purpose, and the lack of it results in destruction. When we reflect upon this whole creation we cannot but see that its purpose is to express an ideal of love, harmony and beauty. Love could not have manifested itself if there were nothing to love, eyes could not have seen if there were nothing to see. What could love have done if there were no beauty? Love would have been silent." Hazrat Inayat Khan

Do you find yourself, from time to time, wishing to express something but knowing that the words will fall on deaf ears? Not deaf exactly, but ears that are not yet ready to hear what you wish to express. If this happens to you then you also are probably struggling with whether or not it makes you somewhat superior to those whom you realize will not hear. It is often an effort to avoid feeling this. And, more often than not, I suspect that you may convince yourself that you have avoided feeling superior while a part of you manages to hold onto it. The mind can be very sneaky about these things.

When you begin to understand the above it is a big step in discovering your own internal elegance. What do I mean by internal elegance? It is quite simply the discovery that you matter. In this discovery, if it is true, there is no need to inform anyone else or to brag or to give the impression that you have attained a higher state of consciousness. It just is and that makes it comfortable.

There is this famous statement that Sufi's often quote when it seems as if complacency is beginning to settle in, "comfort is the enemy of the dervish." For many years I believed this to be a kind of ultimate truth. Now I know it is only a stage. Yes, we must go through an often difficult period of self examination and discipline which can take many years. But, eventually you can come to a place where you realize that your self examination process has become fairly automatic, requiring only the occasional tweak of deep honesty. A great deal of the struggle has to do with pushing through the idea that your self worth is limited. As I have stated many times before, our culture insists on the whole idea of original sin and demands that we feel small. We may even realize that we have been programmed badly but still the programming is there and we must deal with it. And then we get into several bad habits. Having realized that the programming is there we can tend to think that we now understand and can dispense with it. Nope; that's not how it works. I can once again use Tai Chi as an analogy.

It is common knowledge among the really good Tai Chi teachers that many people come to the initial classes and, once they have learned the basic moves, think they now know Tai Chi. The leave, never to return and tell everyone they know that they practice Tai Chi. A lot of people treat spiritual knowledge in just the same way. If however; a person continues to study with a good teacher, such as Majida and I have been blessed with, they will discover that they have just begun. After ten years of study I can honestly say that I am maybe, kind of, possibly beginning to discover the depths of Tai Chi. I can tell you that now, after ten years, I do, very occasionally, for a second or so, feel totally comfortable while doing the Tai Chi form. In those moments the Universe exists and I exist within it. It is exactly the same with reprogramming the psyche.

I hope you understand that this is all developmental, it takes time and the only real way to this discovery is with patience, courage and discipline; the big three. But, occasionally, along the way, it is quite possible to experience this Internal Elegance which is another way of saying that you have touched your soul.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

YOU CAN DO IT!

"Our ability to achieve what we so wish to accomplish is poised precariously upon our self-esteem, and our self-esteem is constrained by our self-image which is a sliver of who we are. Consequently the unfurling of the bounty of who we are potentially is blocked by our refusal to recognize all the dimensions of our being."

Pir Vilayat Inayat Khan

The above quote is very typical of the way that Pir Vilayat spoke all the time. It came to mind after I had a nice conversation with my best friend the other day and we were noticing how vast the vision of Pir Vilayat had been. He often spoke in very broad terms but with very specific objectives, explaining in a concrete manner just what was possible for the person who was willing to follow his lead and deeply explore the inner workings of the mind and soul. One of the points about this teaching of his, that we both noted over and over, was that following his lead took courage.

As I have pointed out in previous blogs, any time that you challenge your idea of who you are, there will be instant psychic resistance. Your personality is quite happy with who it thinks you are and does not like change. So, to follow Pir Vilayat's dictum above, and reach for those dimensions of being that we refuse to recognize, is to go into areas of extreme psychic peril.

He had a number of very simple examples that he used to illustrate what he was eager for his students to understand. One of them was the following: A mother has a small child in her lap and is looking at a picture book. On the page before them is an illustration of a tree. Hidden in the leaves but still visible is a pixie and the child is trying to see it but cannot. The mother keeps encouraging the child to find the pixie, which is very obvious to her but not to the child. Suddenly the child spots the pixie and his face lights up in delight. And the mother hugs the child and tells it how wonderful it is for having discovered the pixie in the tree.

This little illustration seems simple to our adult minds. Obviously the child will have a hard time seeing the pixie in among all that foliage. I wonder though if you can also see that it applies to the adult mind just as well. It is very easy to say, "Yes, I understand what the teacher means." Our task is to ignore this voice that insists it already understands and to truly do the work of discovery that is open to all.

As a spiritual guide myself I am often struck by how long it sometimes takes a person to see something that, to me, is very obvious. I have learned patience but I also wonder what I personally am not seeing. Now, that is a humbling thought. But it is also the kind of thought that helps me along and pushes me over and over again into that precarious ground where the mind is unsure of what it is experiencing and wants to recoil from an examination of the next step in its development.

One thing that my friend noted, in our conversation, that I hadn't really known about the Pir was that he was always surprised when people acted generously or wisely. He was so used to people operating from the small ego and demanding their own version of acknowledgment of the self that when people acted with compassion and understanding he was genuinely surprised; delighted too of course but mostly surprised. I am pretty sure that what surprised him was this very idea of his student acting with courage.

Some of you may know that I am a professional hypnotist. I will not explain how hypnosis works here, perhaps in another blog but for now I will tell you one thing that all hypnotists know. What we do is work with the subconscious and because of this we also know that the subconscious has one job and one job only – its job is self protection. For the purposes of this discussion we can say that its job can only be fulfilled if it protects our version of ourselves that we hold dear. Pir Vilayat used to say that one of the purposes of the meditations and practices that he prescribed was to re-program the personality. Hypnosis is essentially the same. Only in the case of hypnosis it is very case specific while meditation is much more general. Both have their uses.

What excites me is noting that our modern culture is working hard to discover ways to access these unrecognized dimensions of being and implement them in ever more creative ways. The growing acceptance of hypnosis as a viable therapy is only one of these ways. We make a lot of missteps and false starts but we keep trying. If it were not so the Self Help section of bookstores would be empty. We really want to know how to be who we really are. The most important thing you can do is to keep asking, never totally accept your personal version of who you are. It is an amazing experience when you discover that not only are you magnificent, you are also quite capable of manifesting this magnificence.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

THE SCAPEGOAT

Some years ago I was complaining to a friend about the inordinate amount of unfairness that I saw in an organization I belong to. She recommended that I read a book by a Jungian analyst called "Up From Scapegoating," the author is Arthur D. Colman. It was an eye opener about how organizations really work. In the book he uses a story from Ursula LeGuin, “The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas.” It is the story of a perfect society, one in which everyone is completely content. But there is a catch. Here is a description from a web site I found:

"This society is founded on the misery and degradation of one child, imprisoned in a dirty, dark cellar room furnished with a bucket and two mops, kept from human contact and sunlight. (A number of critics have seen Christ-like symbolism in the description of the child). What is worse, everyone in this “joyous city” knows about the child; they are complicit in its inhumane treatment."

Here is the url if you want to read the rest of the synopsis: http://jeffersonflanders.wordpress.com/2006/07/26/summer-reading-ursula-k-le-guin/

The point Mr. Colman was making in using this story was that every association, organization, company or non-profit, apparently requires one or more scapegoats in order to pretend that it's existence is valid. As I read his book I began to see the parallels between what he was speaking about and the behavior I had observed in my own organization. And I felt sad. But then I read something that he wrote that gave me a lot of encouragement. He said that the one most important aspect of scapegoating that people often miss is that the one who is assigned the role need not accept it. In fact this person, who does not accept the role, will often turn out to be the teacher of the group that had once thought of him/her as inferior. I do not expect that but I can certainly understand saying NO.

Spiritual groups seem to be ripe for scapegoatism. I have a theory about why that is. Such groups tend to attract fairly intelligent people who do not do well in normal society. Since they have little chance to be given kudos in contemporary culture, they will look for it within this very limited group. I know this because, at one time, that was my motivation. When I realized I was doing that it was a great shock. And I found myself withdrawing more and more from the center of things. I got angry at people; I told them what I really thought of them and their actions. I ended up being branded an iconoclast, which made me feel good. And now, I know how to say NO. No, I will not support you in your insistence on a doctrine that turns away from Universality and needs the solace of…………..well that is another blog. Whew, that was close, I almost fell prey to anger again.

So, I say to you, all you scapegoats and all of you who scapegoat people, this is not the way. If we cannot find another way then the Universe will grow tired of us and replace us. And we will have earned our fate. If we cannot listen to the voice of creativity; if we demand that all conform; if we limit our experience to what is safe then we have not fulfilled the vision that was set out for us. Otherwise we are no better than that fictional culture that kept the little girl in the dungeon, mindless, ridden with sores, in a constant state of pain.

As I wrote in another blog, there is an arrogance of knowledge that we are subject to. I have seen it and, to my shame, I have participated,. But there is hope. There is an exercise that we can do to stop the arrogance and begin to see what is really important. We can listen. No matter how mundane, no matter how sad, no matter how depressive the content of the statements of the person before us, listen. Within all of that pain is a message, all this person really wants is a friend. Esoteric knowledge is nice, friendship is ever so much better.

I searched a program I have of the works of Hazrat Inayat Khan and was amazed at the number of times he mentions friendship as the most important thing. It isn't spiritual accomplishment or any of those nifty things, just friendship. The following is just one example.

"There is outer expression and inner expression, and we do not always know which is which. We may think many people are far removed from the God-ideal while they are much nearer to God than ourselves. It is difficult for anyone to judge who is near to God and who is not. It is difficult to know even in our own lives what pleases our friend and what does not please him. The more conscientious we are in wanting to please our friend, the more we find how difficult it is to know what will please him and what will not. Not everyone knows it, but then the light of friendship has not been kindled in everyone. Sometimes it remains a word in the dictionary. One who has learned friendship has learned religion. The one who has learned friendship has attained spiritual knowledge. The one who has learned friendship need learn very little else; morals in Persian are called friendship."

And another:

"It is in this way that self-denial is learned; not always by fasting and retreating into the wilderness. A man conscientious in his duty and in his obligations to his friends is more pious than someone sitting in solitude. The one in solitude does not serve God, he only helps himself by enjoying the pleasure of solitude; but the one who proves trustworthy to every soul he meets, and considers his relationships and connections, small or great, as something sacred, certainly observes the spiritual law of that religion which is the religion of all religions."

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

SAY THAT AGAIN!

Life is what happens while you are making other plans.
When I first heard that little cliché I thought, yeah sure, I know that. Still I went on making plans. Silly me.
Now I find that the older I get the less I know and life keeps going on with or without my approval.
All of which leads me to wonder.
Is it me?
Or is it a recording of me?

When the film The Matrix came out, I noticed that a lot of people were all agog at the concept the film introduced. I have been reading Science Fiction since I was 12 so the idea was not startling to me. In fact it was rather ho-hum and, to me, not very well done. It was rather cartoonish, not at all the kind of science fiction that I enjoy. Still, the movies did introduce an alternative way of thinking into people, worrisome though it may be to think we are really controlled by some kind of super computer. For perhaps a nano-second or so, people had a look at their concept of themselves and wondered – am I real? The thought did not last long, in part because it is not at all safe for the psyche to think in this way. I seriously doubt that this thought was more then a momentary blip in the consciousness of most people who saw the movies. It would be there and then they would settle back into their normal state of being, studiously ignoring the small voice within saying, "What if it's real?" It's not real, but it is an interesting metaphor describing what is real.
If we are paying any kind of attention, we have a problem, a quandary. On one hand we have our personal life to live and, to our individual consciousness, it is of supreme importance. On the other hand we are aware, to a greater or lesser degree, that life does go on, whether we pay attention or not; whether we even exist or not. This paradox is probably the source of most of our deeper anxieties and is also the probable source of many of our conflicts with one another.

One of the great consolations of any religion is being told that you are privy to a wonderful secret that only the few are allowed to discover. This is even truer in esoteric groups. We are told that we are special; even though a part of the doctrine will be that we are not. It is another paradox. I suspect that a subconscious reason for this kind of thing is what I mentioned above; the sneaking suspicion that we do not matter at all and therefore must find a reason to matter; just as in the movie The Matrix. This is silly.

We each of us matters because each one of us individually has our own peculiar relationship with the Universe as well as our own particular collection of experiences and attitudes. We are each unique and the Universe needs each and every one of us to understand itself. Never the less, because of the apparent size of things, we continue to wonder if we really matter. So what can we do to counteract this suspicion of ours? The intellect won't do it because an honest person always suspects what the intellect tells him. The emotions won't do it because the fear of being wrong is always there. What will work?

I have been trying to think how it is that I have no problem with the idea that I matter. All I can think of is that it was a gradual realization. Some of it comes from deep meditation but perhaps more comes from observation of how I have changed over the past 30 years. So, once again we come to the conclusion that what really works, in almost every endeavor to understand ourselves and our environment, is simply paying attention. Constantly asking yourself what you are doing, not why, just what, why comes out of what. The problem with why is the possibility of self deception and that blocks realization. Just ask yourself what you are doing at any given moment and something happens inside that I cannot quite explain but it's a good thing.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

WHAT IT IS!

Some years ago I was at Kennedy airport with my teacher Pir Vilayat Inayat Khan. We had to take a long walk between terminals and I took the opportunity to ask him a question that had been on my mind for some time. I tend to puzzle over very broad patterns in how humanity evolves and, at the time, I had been thinking a lot about the coming age and the effect on the relationship between men and women. I was aware that patriarchy had been the main force for several thousand years but I could feel a slight slippage in its power. From my reading of history it was obvious that matriarchy had at one time been the norm and had been replaced by patriarchy starting around 3000 - 4000 years ago. It seemed to me that, as modernity really took hold, the next phase would be one of balance between the sexes. So I asked Pir Vilayat if this would be so. He got this very disgusted look on his face and said, "No, matriarchy will be the next stage." He did not seem at all happy about that idea so I did not follow up with any further questions. But I never forgot his answer, an answer that came out of an extreme honesty, even though the answer was not one that he liked. I can only speculate why he might not like what he saw in this regard so I will reserve my ideas and only build on my own thinking for the purposes of this little essay.

As I have noted elsewhere in my writings, we tend to see the world and humanity's place in it with a very myopic vision. We tend to believe that what is taking place currently is the way that things always have been and always will be. Very few people that I know ever read any history, or even understand that psychological evolution is the norm rather then the exception. We want things to be stable, even if they are uncomfortable or difficult because change is terrifying. I have worked with many people over the years and one thing that I have found is a basic resistance to discovering the true magnificence of being. People would much rather continue to believe they are small and ineffective against the forces arrayed against them. It is ever so much easier to resist change. This is always the first illusion to overcome, that you cannot do. Once that barrier is breached then it becomes a struggle between terror and elation, fear and excitement at all the possibilities that suddenly appear. And Pir Vilayat's declaration is certainly in that style. I have no doubt that, had he lived, he would have gradually become a champion of the coming age.

Some definitions are in order now. Simply put, patriarchy is a vertical ordering of society. Someone is in charge in each social group and there is a scramble below them to decide who is next in line and so on. Verticality of decision is the norm in this model. Pretty much every society on the planet is ordered in this fashion, with the possible exception of some very remote primitive tribes who still hold to matriarchy. Matriarchy on the other hand is horizontal. There is little verticality in decision making, with the exception of listening to wisdom when it is needed. Consensual expression is much more normal and people tend to support one another rather then look for ways to best them. In patriarchy there are winners and losers. In matriarchy there is no contest, only discovering how to agree and support all members. Obviously there are lots of variables in the two ways of being but these are the essentials.

Pir Vilayat was very fond of saying that we are the midwives of the coming age. What he meant by this, I believe, is that our actions will either hinder or assist what is going to take place. Our actions, to some degree, determine not only the rapidity with which the shift is instituted but also the actuality of how it will be experienced. It is very obvious to me that people are afraid, that they sense the coming changes and are afraid. It is the subliminal reason for the high degree of fundamentalism currently in vogue. This I believe. But there are more subtle signs as well. Within spiritual groups, which should know better, there is a definite resistance. Almost all of the traditional groups are falling back on a patriarchal model, with someone in charge, several other someone's jockeying for power roles and the assumption within these groups that the only way a person can be successful within the group is to advance up the ladder of responsibility; which is obviously still the vertical way of doing things. Doing one's best to simply be friends with every one who appears before you is an ideal that is not practiced very much. But, this is very much what is needed.

I think I need to be very clear here. I am not advocating ignoring specific talent. I know for instance that I have a talent for guidance that others do not have. I do not have a talent for many other things and I admire those who do. We do not need some kind of perfect communism. What we do need is simply to see that friendship is normal. Admiring a friend for their talent does not mean that one is also envious and looking for ways to make them small so we can feel big; or worse, ignoring talent that does not fit within the need for power and domination over others. This whole essay is really about noticing what is taking place, without blame, without rancor, without needing to be right, without prejudice. Notice without judgment. If you do that I believe that you will find possibilities within yourself that have been dormant for a long time, maybe f or eons.

If Pir Vilayat was correct, and I believe he was, then we have a very real responsibility to revise the way we think about ourselves and our relationships in a very basic way. Give yourself a moment to examine how you really feel about those around you. Are you content to leave people be who they are or are you constantly looking for how you are better, etc.? We are culturally bound to the latter but the former is where the action is. It only remains to be seen how well we can implement what will take place in the coming age, with or without our cooperation.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

YOU HAVE TO OIL YOUR GIFTS!

The other day a young friend of mine used this phrase. She is Nicaraguan so I thought it was something from her country because it is not a common American saying. But it turns out that it just popped into her head and she said it. So I said I would make it the title of my next blog.

Her spontaneous little cliché reminds me of something that I realized quite awhile ago. I believe it was triggered by something Pir Vilayat said. You may have the greatest of talents but if you do not study the technical side of your talent it will remain potential and never be realized. For instance; you may hear the loveliest of symphonies in your head but if you do not learn to play piano or violin or something, they will never be heard by others. Taking it further; you might even do something quite excellent but if you neglect continual practice your skill or talent will fade.

"Every soul has a definite task, and the fulfillment of each individual purpose can alone lead man aright; illumination comes to him through the medium of his own talent." Hazrat Inayat Khan

I was talking to my best friend the other morning. We were wondering just what the next step for humanity is and how we can best implement our small part. We have conversations like this a lot. One of the conditions that we did note in this particular conversation was how prone people who follow a spiritual path are to assume that they have the answer. It is like a kind of arrogance of knowledge. The idea seems to be that once a person has done a bit of study of one of the various mystical disciplines and has perhaps had some deep meditative experiences, then that person has the right to declare their superior understanding of how the Universe actually works. And then, having made this declaration, work seems to stop. It is an odd but true aspect of personality. A further point is that the system that this person has adopted to display superior knowledge is fixed and needs no renewal. This is patently not true. You may have a talent for esoteric understanding but you still need to oil it from time to time; or else it gets rusty and creaky and annoying to others when you try to use it. And that is just as true of any discipline as it is of the individual.

The most important point I want to make is that there is nothing at all special about being on a spiritual path; it is just what you do. Someone has to do it, it turns out it's you. Every single person on this planet has purpose. We may not recognize it as such, especially if it appears to be extreme or an aberration or worse, harmful of others. Part of the struggle of life is recognizing that it is okay to be who you are but it is not necessary to insist that others recognize it. As it happens, people often do insist and this creates conflict and conflict causes suffering.

You may note here that the sort of person who would insist that others do as they do will also insist that these other victims do their oiling for them. In other words they will demand that all around them support their particular, inevitably limited, vision of what is. Even worse, they may demand that it is God who has dictated their vision. It would seem then that the lesson to be learned from my young friends spontaneous cliché is that we each must look to our own psychic and spiritual needs and allow others to do as they must for themselves. We may not agree, or even understand but, as long as there is no harm being done, then it is best to allow people their quirks.

One of the things that I most appreciated about Pir Vilayat, my teacher, was that he would often iterate the ideal that we were free to accept or reject what he was saying. His teaching was designed to give a person freedom, not to harness them to a particular point of view. And that is my message to you – be free – but do not neglect your gifts.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

CONSISTENCY OF AWARENESS

It has been a very interesting year. We have been settling into our new city and into our new home. But I have been feeling the need to get back to the blog. So I will start off with something I heard this past Sunday.

Majida and I go into New York City about once a month. We go for a couple of reasons. One of the reasons is to take a Tai Chi class on Sunday mornings. The class is given by this little 85 year old lady who was a student of Chen Man Cheng in the early 70's. We cannot get to our old teacher, Ed Young, because he only teaches on Monday night and that is impossible. So we go to his old friend, Maggie Newman. Her style is a bit different from his but just as effective. We do enjoy her classes. She was the one that I heard the title of this blog from.

She speaks very softly so her class of about 20 people was gathered close around her. She was talking about a specific aspect of the Tai Chi form when something reminded her of a story she heard from her chiropractor. Just a little story but poignant none the less. He was telling her about an old woman he knows, in her 90's. She was having memory problems but, when asked if it bothered her she said no, as long as she had consistency of awareness she was fine. What a marvelous thing to say.

On the same day I happened to open a book of Hazrat Inayat Khan's and found the following quote.

"The mystics say that there are three steps to the goal: right life, true life and truth. A person who loves to live a right life and who tries to do it, even if he is not a contemplative or meditative or religious person, must certainly arrive at that high stage, at that goal which is the ideal goal; for within man there is truth, and the seeking of man is truth. Therefore right living helps him to realize truth."

Over the past year it has become more and more apparent to me that the things we do to prove to ourselves that we are this or that are the most important things we do. One of the things that people in the spiritual business do is remind ourselves that we are spiritual because of our outward signs of spirituality. "I meditate every morning" or "I love to take retreats," or "I read spiritual books," or any of a myriad of reminders that tell us that spirituality is a part of our lives. I suppose all of these things are important but, as Pir O Murshid notes above, not really all that necessary. If you are drawn to meditation then you meditate. If you are not drawn then don't do it. But, as the lady noted, the most important thing is not any of these outward signs. Consistency of awareness is the most important spiritual practice there is. Buddhists call it Mindfulness, Sufi's call it Muhasaba (Pir Vilayat defined this as examination of conscience), I call it paying attention.

If you are paying attention, consistently asking yourself what you are doing at each moment then you will get very close to living in the moment. It is a difficult practice because it demands absolute internal honesty on your part but just because it is difficult does not mean it should be avoided; on the contrary, knowledge of self is the result. And the best part is no one need know you are doing it.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

DISAPPOINTMENT

I do not believe that I have ever written about my feelings on religion, other than to occasionally make mention of how I avoid it. The following story though, hit me hard. When I first joined the Sufi Order I was kind of aware of its association with Islam but, as there was no accent on religion, I ignored it. Now, things have changed. Religion is becoming an insistent presence in the Sufi Order and that disappoints me greatly. Especially its association with Islam. There is an assertion within the community that religions need to find a way to stop beating on one another, they need to come together in some manner and teach humanity how to live in peace. It is as if religion is some kind of independent entity that over sees humanity's experiences and expectations. That is silly. Religion always always responds to the culture that spawns it or pretends to depend on it. Almost never does religion actually lead to anything. There are people who are reasonable and sane and willing to listen and then there are the people who do the things related in the following story.

Mother who defied the killers is gunned down

Five weeks ago Leila Hussein told The Observer the chilling story of how her husband had killed their 17-year-old daughter over her friendship with a British soldier in Basra. Now Leila, who had been in hiding, has been murdered - gunned down in cold blood. Afif Sarhan in Basra and Caroline Davies report on the final act of a brutal tragedy

The rest of the story can be read here: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/jun/01/iraq

BEETHOVEN

Last night Majida and I went to a concert by the North East Pennsylvania Philharmonic. Since we are used to the extremely high level of performance in New York City concerts, I admit to being a bit wary. I should not have been concerned. The orchestra was crisp and exciting and fun to listen to. It is small, only about half the size of the NY Philharmonic but then the stage would not have accommodated the NY Philharmonic anyway.

What was truly exciting though was the music. For the first time ever I heard Beethoven's Fifth live. Everyone knows the opening four notes and many have heard recordings but how many of us have heard it performed live? It is such an exciting piece of music, full of surprises and drama. Majida remarked that there is a reason that Beethoven has lasted and this was part of the reason.

As I listened to the music I could not help but reflect that there are large parts of humanity that restricts itself severely to musical styles and by extension to thinking that is very limited. I suppose we do this because it is safe. So the next question then is how much of what us more intellectual types think and do is for safety's sake?

It is all too common for the intellectual to look down upon all others who are not clever enough or educated enough to understand the complexities that we revel in. What I have noticed however is that these complexities tend to become frozen. Normal enough I suppose, we really do need safe, even when the safety is gleaned from a momentary flash of brave exploration.

What the mystics advise is to approach each instant in time anew. It is probably unavoidable that we bring our assumptions and opinions and experiences to each new moment, however, we can also step back a bit and enter into each new instant with an attitude of newness. It is a discipline that must be learned but it can be done. Granted that is a place of danger since you are deliberately abandoning what you know to work, to be safe. I admit to being able to do this very rarely but I do attempt it from time to time. I am very often guilty of judging a person or a situation based on my prejudices. Never the less, I do work on stepping around them and looking afresh. It does not always work but very occasionally it does.

So, I sat in the concert hall, great seats by the way, and simply enjoyed the music. I let myself sink into the moment and enjoyed. I found myself with a big smile, bouncing to the rhythm and joy of one of the great symphonies.

I can remember a person, myself in the past, who would have been very stern and concerned mostly with his image to others. He would have been very afraid that someone would find out that he did not really understand classical music and he would have been determined to present a knowledgeable front, but terrified of his lack of actual knowledge. How silly is that? Thank God that we are allowed to transcend such silliness, should we so choose.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

MEMORIAL

Julia NUR JAMIL duhrsen

August 18, 1958 – March 23, 2008

As most of my readers know, I have a very few people who look to me for spiritual guidance. I am not sure of the actual number but it is small, around 40 or 50 probably. Of those maybe 10 people are in fairly regular communication. On Easter Sunday last, one of them died.

Nur Jamil (Light of Beauty) was my friend. That is what it always comes down to eventually, friendship. The reason for her death is not as important as the impact her living being had on the people around her. Her life was one of constant struggle, a never ending series of very serious challenges which she not only met head on but allowed to shape her over all attitude toward life in general. Nur Jamil was one of those very rare people with no enemies. Everyone who met her went away feeling as if they had been given something precious, though often they had no idea what it was.

This past Sunday Majida and I officiated at a memorial service for Nur Jamil in Yonkers, NY. The service was held in one of those funeral home rooms that we have all been in at some point. And it was packed. There were people standing in the halls. It is rare that a Universal Worship attracts that kind of attention but of course it was not the service at all but the reason for the service. We conducted the normal service up to the point of the sermon. Then without expressing any opinion ourselves, we asked those who wished to express their feelings or thoughts about Julia. Person after person arose to stand in front of the audience and express their deep gratitude for the opportunity to know a truly innocent, totally giving individual. It was a bit strange for me to listen to since I knew her as my student and friend. She came to me for advice but apparently it was the other way round for everyone else. Listening to the deep emotion being expressed was a cathartic experience for her family and her closest friends. It was obvious that such a person, in their innocence, affects people in the most profound way, just because they are being who they are.

When everyone else was finished speaking I was moved to say just a few words. What I found myself saying was that we are all connected. We are all individuals but there is also a unity that we exist within. Occasionally a soul appears to remind us of this deep connection. Julia Nur Jamil was one such soul. I will miss her.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

AN INTERNATIONAL EDITION!

I just looked at my page on my publishers web site and saw the following announcement:
A SOUTH ASIA EDITION of The Sovereign Soul: Sufism: A Path for Today was published by Readworthy Publications Ltd., of New Delhi, India, in February 2008, under the title Sufism: A Path for Today: The Sovereign Soul. Readworthy is a new imprint of D.K. Printworld Ltd., also of New Delhi. The Readworthy edition is available both as a paperback and in hardcover form.

The first I knew of this was when two books arrived in the mail. One hardback. Wow. I am international. Isn't that cool?

If you are interested, you can see the book and some reviews at http://newpara.com/The_Sovereign_Soul.htm

OUR NEW HOUSE!

This is our new home in Scranton PA. Lot's of people have asked us, why Scranton? The truth is that it was total serendipity. I was surfing the real estate parts of the web and saw this house. We went to see it and decided this was the house for us. Now, it turns out that it is perfect in many ways. Last night my daughter was commenting about how nice everyone is here and what a contrast it is to NYC. She was raised in NYC and has little experience with small town America. Now she is noticing just how closed New Yorkers are. Of course it is understandable to be wary when you live amidst 17 million other people but she had never really noticed it because she was in it.

When you live in New York City, you take rudeness for granted. Well not rudeness exactly, it is more like being constantly on guard. Since you never know just where the next assault is going to come from you are constantly tense. So it is a bit of a shock to find that people here do not have that reaction. There is tension of course, that is hard to avoid in this modern age, but it is at a much lower rate.

And the house is lovely. There is a lot of work to be done on it but the electricity and plumbing are new (thank god) so I can do almost all the work myself.

So, we are here. It is good. And life is still to be discovered.

I will write another philosophical blog when the dust settles a bit.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

ILLUSION and INTENT

The following is an answer I wrote to someone I guide in response to a question she asked about what to do when nothing seems to be happening. It is a question that has come up quite a bit lately so I thought I would post my response to her hoping that it might also answer someone else with the same sort of question. In deference to the individual I am not posting the original question but I do not think it is really needed.

"I think there comes a time in one's spiritual life when the illusion of one's intent begins to pale. It is as if one must go deeper but we don't know quite how to do it. Consequently we might tend to feel that our spiritual life is becoming quite meaningless. This is a place where pushing thru becomes the important thing. I think it is when the trappings no longer seem quite so important and something else must arise within us. All of the things we do are part of our support system, they are the things that we latch onto in order to make some sense of the inner turmoil of true spirituality. For awhile they make us comfortable and, for some, they are the most important thing. But eventually a person might come to understand that all of these rituals only are the bare surface of an extremely deep experience. Really, they are cultural, just as most things are. I imagine that you have reached this place. Now the real question is why go on?"
Much Love, Musawwir

GRATITUDE

"A person, however learned and qualified in his life's work, in whom gratitude is absent, is devoid of that beauty of character which makes personality fragrant."

Hazrat Inayat Khan

I realized something the other day. It came quite suddenly. I was at a yield sign, entering a parkway, waiting for a space in the traffic to merge. Someone slowed down and flashed their lights at me to let me know they would allow me in. I merged and raised my hand in a sign of gratitude. Just at that moment, I realized that, when I do the same for someone, allow them to merge into traffic ahead of me, I more or less expect some sign of gratitude from them. A wave will usually do or a nod of acknowledgment. When you drive the interstate at night and a truck passes you and you flash your lights to let the driver know that the rear of his trailer has cleared the front of your vehicle and it is safe to re-enter the right hand lane, the driver will usually flash his running lights as an acknowledgment of your politeness. I expect it and almost always get it but not every time. When the truck driver does not flash his running lights I feel cheated. It is silly I suppose but the memory of disappointment is there.

Another part of the realization I had was recognizing my expectation of disappointment. It was strange to realize that the two emotions exist simultaneously. On the one hand I expect to see someone's gratitude and on the other I expect to be ignored. And there is another thing that occurs to me.

I have this habit, which I suppose a lot of people who lived thru the 60's have. When I go someplace where I know the parking is going to be tight I ask what I call my parking genii to find me a parking space. When I arrive where I am going and find the parking space, which is almost always there, I thank my parking genii. I think of it as expressing gratitude to the Universe for the experience of living, even in this small way.

I used to think God, now I think Universe but I suspect they are the same thing. To have this wonderful opportunity of experiencing physical reality on such a beautiful planet; to be able to challenge our assumptions and values; to create a life's dream in a strange land - all of these things challenge us in a way that is truly creative and nourishing to the soul.

These little moments of gratitude which are expressed between strangers on the road, as I mentioned above, or an indication of the possibility of gratitude that we need to express toward whatever we think of as the creator of this wonderful opportunity. It may be random chaos or it may be intricately planned but whatever did create it, there is no doubt that it is wonderful and genuinely worth the effort.

What is to be avoided is gratitude guilt. Ya know? Someone, usually your mom but it could easily be another authority figure in your life, telling you that you should be grateful. This spoils gratitude. It is easy to see that if a child is continually told that they should be anything they are going to resent it. It isn't a natural emotion if it is forced on you. One of the most special moments in my life was when my grand daughter, then just over two, crawled up into my lap and said, "I love you grandpa." I thought I would melt. No one told her to do this, it was quite spontaneous. How do you think she would do if she were told to tell me? I cherish this moment and how she has grown to be totally honest about her emotions, angry as well as elated.

I believe that most cultures have some kind of ceremony of gratitude. Our Western culture, mostly Christian, certainly has these. I can remember sitting in Lutheran church, listening to the minister talk about being grateful and looking around at all the stern unhappy faces. I was a kid but I would wonder why nobody looked all that grateful. It confuses a little kid to be told that he should be feeling gratitude for being forgiven for sins that he didn't even know he was responsible for. How lame is that, but that is the message that was given, is still being given I suppose. Gratitude should not be demanded.

The question then is what is genuine in our emotions? If we express gratitude in some way do we expect an acknowledgment? And if we do then why do we expect something that should be freely given? It is a challenge isn't it.

This all goes back to my last blog about questions. Ultimately what is necessary is that we continually examine our emotions, our thoughts and our subliminal beliefs. Everything comes under the mental microscope, nothing is exempt. And then, eventually, gratitude will come.

Love & Blessings, Musawwir

QUESTIONS

"Great knowledge is broad and unhurried, while small understanding is cramped and busy"

Zhuangzi as quoted in The Great Transformation by Karen Armstrong

I love Karen Armstrong's books. I always learn something new about history, religious or otherwise and I always enjoy the wonderful insights she brings forth when she writes about her subject. My fondest wish is to have a nice long conversation with her some day.

The quote above is one of those sayings that you can use to examine the self. Is my knowledge broad and unhurried or do I remain small? My teacher, Pir Vilayat used to say something similar. He would say that we see ourselves as puny and unable to affect anything vast while our beings are magnificent and glorious. We live in a small illusion when all the while our true reality is immeasurable.

As I read The Great Transformation I am seeing that one of the most important ideas or philosophies to come from the Axial Age is self examination or what the Buddha called Mindfulness. One continually questions oneself. To sit and contemplate, to examine, to pursue each thought to its ending, to ceaselessly pay attention to your own reality is perhaps the most important of spiritual practices. This I have believed for many years but I really did not know that it all started over 2500 years ago. Humanity has actually learned a thing or two.

It is our habit, in this age of disappointment, to look to the ancient world as a time of peace and unity and wonderful simplicity. We want to believe that there was a time when humanity actually was peaceful. According to history it was not so. In fact, when you read The Great Transformation, besides the wonderful spiritual philosophies that were being developed, the one very obvious fact was that every one was in a constant state of warfare. The sage would look upon this warfare in any of several ways but usually in one way, that the wars raging around them and in which they were sometimes unavoidably involved, were merely small cramped busy understandings. What is different today is not that the cramped understandings have gotten any looser but that there are more and more people who are reaching for that true broad knowledge. Just the explosion of spiritual books in the past 100 years should tell you that. The only real question then is, what are you personally doing to enhance the breadth of your understanding?

In my last blog I wrote about endings and how all things eventually pass away into dust. "What then do we accomplish in the world if eventually it is all swept away into the wind as ashes?" A couple of people commented that it was what we did in between birth and death that really counts and of course that is true. However, there is more. There is a state of being that is hinted at in the deeper spiritual texts but which cannot really be explained. For centuries humanity has been talking around it, trying to say that which cannot be said, continually reaching for the unknowable.

"This craving for the attainment of what is unattainable, gives the soul a longing to reach life's utmost heights. It is the nature of the soul to try and discover what is behind the veil; it is the soul's constant longing to climb heights which are beyond his power; it is the desire of the soul to see something that it has never seen; it is the constant longing of the soul to know something it has never known. But the most wonderful thing about it is that the soul already knows there is something behind this veil, the veil of perplexity; that there is something to be sought for in the highest spheres of life; that there is some beauty to be seen; that there is Someone to be known who is knowable. This desire, this longing, is not acquired; this desire is a dim knowledge of the soul which it has in itself." Hazrat Inayat Khan

You will notice that Pir O Murshid states that the knowledge is already there, that it is intrinsic to our beings, it is just up to us to discover how to unveil this unattainable knowledge. How then to do it when this wisdom is so obviously unknowable? Well you can't get there from here.

On the same page as the first quote I used is a conversation between Confucius and his student Yan Hui:

"I'm gaining ground!" Yan Hui had announced on day.

"What do you mean?" asked Confucius.

"I've forgotten Humanity and Duty completely." Yah Hui replied

"Not bad!" admitted Confucius. "But that's still not it."

A few days later, Yah Hui exclaimed: "I've forgotten ritual and music completely."

"That's still not it." said Confucius.

But finally Yah Hui surprised his master. "I'm gaining ground!" he beamed. "I sit quietly and forget."

Confucius shifted uneasily. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"I let the body fall away and the intellect fade." Said Yah Hui. "I throw out form, abandon understanding – and then move freely, blending away into the great transformation. That's what I mean by sit quietly and forget."

Confucius went pale; his disciple had surpassed him.

"if you blend away like that, you're free of likes and dislikes," he said. "If you're all transformation, you're free of permanence. So in the end, the true sage here is you! So you won't mind if I follow you from now on, will you?"

Love & Blessings, Musawwir